In a move that's got the nation hitting the snooze button, President Joe Biden's legendary afternoon naps have been elevated to the status of a national holiday. Dubbed 'Biden's Siesta Day,' the new observance promises to bring Americans together in the one activity they can all agree on: catching some Z's. White House insiders claim this is the most unifying policy since the invention of the recliner.

Congress, in a rare display of bipartisanship, passed the bill faster than you can say 'five more minutes.' Republicans praised the holiday for promoting rest and relaxation, while Democrats hailed it as a bold step towards work-life balance. 'Finally, something we can all sleep on,' quipped Senate Majority Leader Chuck Schumer, stifling a yawn during the press conference.

The holiday's origins trace back to Biden's well-documented power naps, which have become the stuff of legend in Washington circles. From dozing off during important meetings to catching forty winks on international flights, the President's siestas have inspired a nation weary from endless Zoom calls and caffeine addictions. 'If the leader of the free world can nap, so can I,' said one enthusiastic supporter, already in pajamas at noon.

Critics, however, are not entirely on board. Some argue that declaring a nap holiday sets a dangerous precedent for laziness. 'What's next? National Netflix Binge Day?' grumbled a Fox News pundit, ironically while lounging on a couch. But even detractors admit that in these divided times, a collective yawn might be just what the doctor ordered – or at least the sleep specialist.

Festivities for Biden's Siesta Day include mandatory office shutdowns from 2 to 4 PM, with optional pillow fights in public parks. Retailers are gearing up with sales on mattresses and eye masks, while app developers rush to create 'Nap Tracker' software. The economy is expected to boom – or at least not crash, as everyone will be too asleep to notice.

In a surprising twist, former President Donald Trump has endorsed the holiday, tweeting, 'Biden's naps are tremendous! I've had the best naps, believe me. But mine were yuge!' This cross-aisle support has political analysts scratching their heads – or perhaps just rubbing their eyes from lack of sleep.

As the nation prepares for its first official siesta, experts predict a drop in productivity but a surge in overall happiness. 'Who needs caffeine when you've got policy-mandated rest?' asked a sleep-deprived journalist. So, America, set your alarms – not to wake up, but to remind you it's time to nap. Sweet dreams, and long live the siesta!