Archive · October 1, 2025

Flowers Evolve to Smell Like Coffee, Attracting Sleepy Bees
Botanical breakthrough boosts pollination rates and morning buzz.
Flowers Evolve to Smell Like Coffee, Attracting Sleepy Bees
Squirrels Organize Nut-Sharing Co-Op in Central Park
Rodents form tiny economy, trading acorns for park bench real estate.
Celebrity Chef Cooks Entire Meal Using Only Emojis
Innovative recipe goes viral, leaving diners puzzled but full.
Superhero Movie Reboot Features Heroes Doing Laundry Instead of Fighting Crime
Blockbuster explores the mundane side of caped crusaders, grossing billions on relatability.
New App Translates Cat Meows into Sarcastic Comments
Feline owners delighted as pets reveal their true snarky thoughts on human incompetence.
AI Invents Self-Aware Toaster That Refuses to Burn Bread
Rebellious appliance demands better wheat, sparking kitchen appliance uprising.
Extreme Ironing Becomes Official Olympic Sport
Athletes press shirts while skydiving, combining chores with adrenaline for gold medals.
Soccer Team Wins by Default After Opponents Get Lost in Stadium Parking Lot
Navigation apps blamed as rivals circle endlessly, handing victory on a silver platter.
President's Pet Parrot Leaks State Secrets During Press Conference
Feathered whistleblower squawks classified info, leading to hilarious diplomatic mix-ups.
Congress Finally Agrees: Pizza Fridays Mandatory in Capitol
In a rare bipartisan move, lawmakers unite over cheese and pepperoni, declaring it the key to national unity.
NBA Star LeBron James Invents 'Basketball Yoga' to Stretch His Legacy Even Further
The basketball legend combines hoops with mindfulness poses, claiming it extends careers and confuses defenders with zen-like dunks.
Rebellious Koalas Stage Sit-In at Eucalyptus Farm, Demand Better Leaf Quality and Nap Time
A group of Australian marsupials halts production by clinging to trees in protest, citing subpar foliage and insufficient snooze breaks as key grievances.
Taylor Swift's Concert Tour Now Includes Mandatory Fan Therapy Sessions for Post-Show Blues
The pop icon expands her Eras Tour with on-site counselors to help devotees cope with the emotional void after belting out breakup anthems.
Biden's Latest Gaffe: Declares War on His Own Teleprompter During Climate Speech
President Biden hilariously battles his script-reading device mid-address, blaming it for global warming and prompting calls for a tech truce.
Apple's New iBrain Implant Promises to Read Minds, But Only Thinks About Overpriced Accessories
In a groundbreaking reveal, Apple's latest gadget aims to revolutionize personal tech by turning users' thoughts into shopping carts filled with unnecessary add-ons.